


Christmas Punch & Kisses

by RagingBookDragon



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: Christmas Party, Drinking, Explicit Language, First Kiss, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Love Confessions, Minor Violence, Mostly Humor though, Punching, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:08:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27868953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RagingBookDragon/pseuds/RagingBookDragon
Summary: Haytham chuckled. “Given their bravery and skill, I think one of them should get the Christmas bonus this year.” That caught their attention and they stared at him.“The Christmas what?” she repeated.Shay nodded excitedly. “Aye, what’s that?”The Grandmaster regarded the two of them, dark brows furrowed as he asked, “Gist didn’t mention it to either of you?”With that they looked at the frontiersman who grinned sheepishly. “I believe it slipped my mind.”
Relationships: Haytham Kenway/Reader, Haytham Kenway/You
Comments: 6
Kudos: 23





	Christmas Punch & Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> Day 3 of December-Christmas fics! Let's go! Enjoy! -Thorne

With the yearly Christmas party in full swing, half of the Templars were drunk off their rockers and the other half were stuffing their faces with food—well on their way to becoming drunker than skunks. (Y/N) sat between Haytham and Shay, an amused expression on her face as she listened to Shay’s rather _embellished_ tale of the sea battle between the Morrigan and the Storm Fortress.

The Irishman curled an arm around her neck, ignoring how she grunted when his tug caused her to spill the rum. “—And the lass jumped up, grabbed the wheel and yelled for the crew to drop the port side anchor.” The group stared in at her like she had three heads, but it didn’t stop Shay. “We hit hard at port, the Morrigan spun and showed starboard and she just screamed, ‘ _Fire_!’” He beamed with pride. “And we blew half the Storm Fortress to kingdom come.”

(Y/N) shrugged off his arm and set her drink down on the table. “Well, _someone_ had to take charge and sink the ship.” The Templars around her let out ‘ _ooo’s_ ’ and she grinned. “You were too busy _passing_ _out_.”

Shay pressed a hand to his chest. “My own best friend wounding my pride like this. How could she?”

She snorted and elbowed him in the side. “Hey, _I_ _saved_ our asses _and_ _sunk_ one of the fiercest ships on the seven seas.” (Y/N) curled an arm around his neck and gave him a noogie. “I think I’m allowed to wound some Captain’s pride.” The group laughed at the two, and Haytham, who’d been watching them with mild amusement set his wine glass down.

“I wasn’t aware you could sail, (Y/N). How’d a young woman become skilled enough to take down a Man O’War?” he inquired, catching her eye.

She nodded. “Shay’s dad used to dress me up as a boy in order to take me on the ship with them as a kid. I caught on quick.” Sharing a look with Shay, she remarked, “He’s also been lenient enough with the wheel to let me sail around the North Atlantic a few times.”

“ _Lenient_?” Shay scoffed. “ _You kicked me in the gonads and took the wheel from me_.” (Y/N) tipped her head back and cackled.

When she calmed, she leaned her head on his shoulder. “ _I asked politely, and you declined._ What was I supposed to do?”

“ _Not kick me in the crotch! That’s what_!”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes. “ _Little bitch_.”

“ _Harlot_!” he retorted and the two glowered at each other, much to the delight of the group.

Haytham chuckled. “Given their bravery and skill, I think one of them should get the Christmas bonus this year.” That caught their attention and they stared at him.

“ _The Christmas_ _what_?” she repeated.

Shay nodded excitedly. “Aye, what’s that?”

The Grandmaster regarded the two of them, dark brows furrowed as he asked, “Gist didn’t mention it to either of you?”

With that they looked at the frontiersman who grinned sheepishly. “I believe it slipped my mind.”

Their glower made him sink his neck into his shoulders and Haytham huffed. “Then I shall explain.” He said. “The Christmas bonus is a minor increase in pay that one special member gets at the end of the year for their work in the Order.”

“How much is ‘ _minor’_?” she questioned.

“Fifteen hundred pounds.”

Their jaws dropped and (Y/N) shoved her hand against the side of Shay’s face, blurting out, “I sunk the Storm Fortress!”

He spluttered, yanking her hand down. “I took over New York!”

She spun on him and glared. “ _I_ helped!”

“Oh please! You didn’t do a _damn_ thing!”

“Excuse you! _I_ was the one who conquered the headquarters in Waterfront _and_ East Village while _you_ were nursing a _head cold_!”

The templars snorted and Shay flushed. “I was running a _high fever_! It was _strategic_ to retreat and get better!”

“How the _hell_ did your ass even manage to make it this far in life to make strategic retreats?!”

“Probably the way _your_ ass managed to make it this far by _brown-nosing_!”

(Y/N) recoiled, dramatically gasping. “ _How. Dare. You_.” She pointed at him. “ _Take that back_.”

Shay glared and grabbed her rum. He chugged the entire thing and slammed the tankard down. “ _Over. My. Dead. Body_.”

“ _That can be arranged_.” She hissed.

But before she could even jump his way, they heard, “Enough.” It was humored, but it was firm, and they reacted like unruly children, sulking in their seats. Their gazes snapped to Haytham. “You two argue like siblings.”

They shared a look, then smiles grew on their faces, and she said, “ _Hell_ , _we’ve been conjoined at the hip since we were kids_.”

Shay nodded. “ _Couldn’t imagine life without you, lass_.”

The group awwed and Haytham said, “Since it’s clear the two of you are willing to go to war over the bonus,” he paused, taking in their grins. “How about one of you gets the bonus and the other can take a request.”

(Y/N) cocked a brow. “A request? Like a request to move, _or_?”

Haytham shrugged. “A request for anything you’d like. Whatever’s been on your mind or in your wildest dreams.” She opened her mouth and he added, “ _Within reason_ , _of course. No asking for the Royal Throne_.”

The Irishman snorted. “Looks like _your_ plans are gone, (Y/N).”

She let out a ‘ _pfft’_ and nodded. “Shay can have the bonus. I’ll take the request.”

“But what if I have a req—”

He started to complain, but she turned and grabbed the front of his shirt, bunching it in her fist. (Y/N) pulled them nose to nose and hissed, “ _Take the goddamn pay raise or I swear to God I’ll flay you alive_.”

His coffee eyes went wide, and he nodded rapidly, looking to Haytham. **“(Y/N) can have the request. I’ll take the pay raise, sir**.”

Haytham snorted and turned his attention to her as she was releasing her friend. “So, (Y/N), what request are you so _adamantly_ wanting?”

She narrowed her gaze and queried, “I can ask for anything so long as it’s within reason?”

He nodded. “Absolutely. If I can grant it, I will.”

Suspicions entered her tone. “You’re not lying to me? You won’t back out if I ask for something peculiar? I won’t get punished if I ask for perhaps,” her eyes drifted to Charles. “to knee him in the groin?”

Sighing heavily, he nodded. “On my honor, I won’t back out nor punish you.” Charles squealed in shock.

(Y/N) slapped the table. “ _Done_.” She stood and pointed at Haytham. “ _I want to punch you in the face_.”

The entire table went silent, evidently not expecting that, save for Shay who buried his face in his hands, laughing hysterically. “ **Dear god, (Y/N)**.” he guffawed.

She ignored him and stared straight at the Grandmaster.

He blinked at her, repeating, “ _You_ …want to punch… _me_?”

She nodded. “You’re _damn right_ I want to punch you. _Right now. One good time. In the jaw._ As _hard_ as I possibly can.”

With his face pinching in confusion, Haytham’s mouth opened and closed until all he could ask was, “ _Why_?”

(Y/N) crossed her arms over her chest. “Because I have suffered _three_ _years_ of the antagonism and arrogance and,” she took a deep breath, “ _nothing_ _would make me happier than taking out all of my pent up, infernal, ungodly rage in the form of punching you_.”

She nodded at him. “So _get up_ , because it’s happening _right now_.”

“ _But_ —”

Pointing at him, she said, “ _Nuh-uh_. You said on your honor you won’t back out.” Cracking her knuckles, she quipped, “ _Grow a backbone and take my request like a man, Grandmaster_.”

He narrowed his eyes at her and (Y/N) could see fury swimming in them, but she simply grinned and stared back. Finally, Haytham let out a sigh and removed his tricorn, placing it on the table.

“Let’s get this over with then.”

An unnatural smile spread across her face and she shifted until they stood a couple feet apart.

Haytham gazed at her. “I can’t believe _this_ is the request you wanted.”

(Y/N) shrugged, testing out the angle of her swing. “I’ve spent the last _three years_ listening to your _Holier-Than-Thou-I-Have-My-Head-Shoved-Up-My-Ass-Because-I-Believe-I’m-Superior-To-Everyone-Attitude_.” She motioned to him. “Don’t get me wrong, you _are_ superior in skill, but _you’re annoying as hell about it and I have dreamed about this moment like Shay dreams about getting laid_.”

“ **HEY**!” Shay shouted, but she disregarded him.

“And now, my dream gets to come true and I’m _not_ gonna get punished for it?” She flashed a pearly white smile. “What better request could I ask for?”

Haytham didn’t respond, but the set of his jaw made her giggle. “ _Good on you for locking your jaw_.” She clenched her fist. “‘ _Cause this is gonna hurt_.”

(Y/N) cocked her arm back and swung as hard as she could possibly manage and when she connected with Haytham’s jaw, she knew it was going to leave a mark. The blow sent Haytham staggering backwards and he dropped to a knee, reaching up to grab his face.

His head tilted upwards and though she kept it hidden, mild surprise bled through her when she saw the split in his lip.

She threw her hands in the air in victory. “ **YES! YES! YES**!” (Y/N) pointed at Shay. “ **KISS MY ASS, YOU IRISH BASTARD**!”

Shay recoiled. “ _Why are you badgering me_?!”

(Y/N) grabbed his beer tankard and downed it before slamming it on the table. “ _Alright! I’m out of here_!”

“Where are _you_ going?!” Shay yelled.

She waved a hand. “ _I doubt I’m overly welcome right now so I’m going to find some cheap beer to drink and find some Christmas carolers to egg_!” (Y/N) turned and made finger guns at them before exiting into the hallway.

*******

She lay on her back at the edge of the docks, eyes directed to the stars above. They twinkled like millions of little candles and it made her smile, thinking about the stories Shay’s dad used to tell the two of them when they were kids. Her fingers curled around the bottle of rum, but she forwent drinking from it anymore, simply letting herself enjoy the mild haze clouding her mind.

The sound of boots against the dock caught her attention and she tipped her head back, catching sight of Haytham coming her way. She grinned. “Come to punish me in secret?”

He scoffed and took a seat beside her. “That _really_ hurt.”

Even by the moonlight she could see the dark crimson bruise spreading across his lower jaw and chin. The worst of it was at the left corner of his lip where she’d split it. He’d successfully stopped the bleeding but if it didn’t scar, it’d certainly take a while to heal.

“ _Good_ ,” she said. “ _I meant for it to_.”

His steel eyes dropped down to her and she grunted as she heaved herself up and maneuvered until her head was resting on his thigh.

“I don’t remember giving you permission to use me as a pillow, (Y/N).”

She cocked an eyebrow, countering, “Well if having a woman on your lap is so _perturbing_ to you, feel free to move me.”

Haytham huffed, but conceded, choosing instead to rest his arm across her chest, his fingers twirling the ring on the necklace she wore.

“This is a unique design,” he commented. “I’ve never seen such a thing.”

(Y/N) tipped her chin down to look at it, her lips brushing the tips of his fingers. “It’s called a Witch’s Heart.” She stared at the rubies set in the gold, ten around a bigger one in the middle, positioned slightly pointing to the right. “Belonged to my great-great aunt.”

“Was she a witch?” Haytham inquired.

“That’s _not_ what the ring symbolizes, but to answer anyway, she might’ve been, might’ve not been. I’ll never know though.” (Y/N) murmured.

“Salem witch trials?” he guessed.

“She was a widow who owned a great deal of land.” Her eyes hardened. “There wasn’t anyone to defend on her behalf and they hung her in a make-believe trial.”

“Father or mother’s side?”

“Father’s.”

He was quiet a moment, then asked, “May I ask you a question, (Y/N)?”

“ _Other than that one_?” she quipped, but his narrowed gaze had her rolling her eyes. “ _Knock yourself out_.”

“Do you hate me?”

Haytham’s question was quiet, as if he were unsure of himself and she met his eyes.

“Why would you think— _oh, that, right_.” She directed her gaze sideways, looking to where the sea met the sky. “ _Nah_ , _you just irritate the piss out of me sometimes. If I really hated you, I wouldn’t ever come into contact with you and let Shay do it for me_.” (Y/N) hummed. “Why do you ask?”

“Curiosity.”

“ **Fuck off**.”

“ _Excuse me_?”

She winced, giggling as she said, “Sorry, I didn’t mean that.” (Y/N) cleared her throat. “What I meant was, ‘ _you’re lying’_.”

“Not many have ever accused _me_ of lying.”

“I guess that means _I’m_ the rarity.”

Haytham smiled. “You are.”

(Y/N) peered at his face. “So, what’s the _real_ reason you’re asking? Are you afraid of being subject to my hate?”

His eyes searched hers and he admitted, “I am.” Her eyes widened. “You are one of the few I wouldn’t want to be hated by.”

She didn’t say anything for a few moments, then she murmured, “Can I ask for another request?”

“ **You’re not punching me again**.” He said firmly.

“ _Not what I want, Haytham_.”

He sighed. “If you must.”

(Y/N) reached up and gently prodded his lower lip, smiling when he hissed slightly. “ _I request a Christmas kiss…think you’re up for it_?”

Haytham’s free hand grabbed hers and he pressed a kiss to her fingertips before bending down. “ _I think I can work something out_.”


End file.
